George Stephanopoulos: Welcome to This Week In Washington, where we've assembled a facile panel of idiots to try to tackle basic Keynesian economics. Newt Gingrich, Peggy Noonan, George Will, and Tom Friedman ... let's start!
Tom: We need to go big, go green, and go ... *smart*. We need to smarten up the government. It's all in my new book, "The Smartening: The Future Of Our Big Green Economy", available at your local airport bookstore and featured on the bookshelves of people you can't believe are more successful than you.
Peggy: Recession? What recession? All the rich people I know still have their money!
/actually said that
Tom: We need to harness the now, and roundify the flatness.
G. Will: You see, this all reminds me of something Samuel Johnson said that reminds me of the greatness of Ronald Reagan ...
Newt: My dissertation was on Belgian education policy in Africa. What could I possibly contribute to this conversation?
Tom: I've been to China. They have money in China, you know. China!
/puts on stupid hat, raps with Coolio
Tom: Here's what we say to Wall Street. Here it is. What we say is:
/gesturing with thumb and forefinger like he's about to throw a dart
If I can change ... and you can change ...
/furrows brow, moustache
Everybody. Can. Change.
/G. Will, Peggy, Stephanopoulos nod approvingly
Newt: Isn't that from "Rocky IV"?
G. Will: As I believe Cicero once asked: is Obama working hard? Or hardly working?
Newt: That's from a truck stop t-shirt!
Tom: Rammer. Jammer.
/pushes fingers into palm
George Stephanopoulos: Thanks, everyone! Next week, we'll have Bill Kristol, Charles Krauthammer, Maureen Dowd and Mickey Kaus attempt to adequately explain the consequences of an unregulated derivative market.
/furiously masturbates to that commercial with Uncle Phil